1st-and-Crown… With a Frown

Another week, another hit to my fantasy football cred. At this rate, the European Union is going to have to bail us out by week 7. The latest debacle? A 105-71 loss, thanks to strong performances from Stevie Johnson (0 points) and Andy Dalton (who helped AJ Green earn 5 pts). 5 total points from my wide receivers… not a winning recipe.

How are we going to lose this week? I bet it'll be painful!

Week 5 is clearly going to get ugly, as we face the combined might of 8 teams! We're matched up against Bay Area Sports Guy, which covers the Giants, 49ers, Warriors, Raiders, Athletics, Sharks, Stanford and Cal.

Our lineup and his:

QB Joe Flacco vs Colin Kaepernick

RB Stevan Ridley vs Chris Johnson

RB Ryan Mathews vs Bernard Pierce

WR AJ Green vs Julian Edelman

WR Randle Cobb vs Calvin Johnson

TE Coby Fleener vs Julius Thomas

K Dan Bailey vs Steven Hauschka

DST Cleveland (20pts) vs Titans

With a 20pt effort from the Browns DST, I feel like we'll make a game of this, only to get our souls crushed on some last-second TD run by Kaepernick. Whatever. I hate football.